Serendipity

i’ve been irresponsible these past few months… most of all i’ve hurt the one’s i love… that has to change. This year im turning a new leaf… i have to set my priorities straight. That is…that family always comes first. I’ve set aside time to take care of my lovely daughter… i miss her. i know i have never been a good father lately, i’ll try to change that and make it up to you this year… that is my promise. It is time that i put my family’s needs above my own.

Staring at the computer screen for hours on end… i dont know what to expect… do i need to? sometimes i ask myself why do i do this to myself. why cant i just set it aside for now. Maybe thats what i need to do. But ever since i’ve been this way. i cant seem to get detach sometimes….most of the times. A couple of days back ’till now… i think i’ve seen some change…its difficult but i think im making progress. Maybe someday… someday… i could be that man.

Taking the right path is really difficult, maybe that’s the reason most of us shy away from it. Its easier to take the other one… why bother. We can never say i have no choice in things…i did that because that’s the only thing available to me… but no… that is not the case…we just dont like the choice in front of us. Taking the right one takes a little bit of courage… and its realy a test of your will especially it involves your loved ones. As the cliche goes "If you love them set them free" let be what they are, give them what makes them happy. Even if means letting them go. I guess we will just have to find a away to finally accept it within ourselves to be happy for them. It may be the hardest test we have to face, how much do you love them… how much can we give… giving without the thought of getting anything in return. Right now im trying…really trying…its really hard… it sometmes feels lonely…but slowly im getting to see the light at the end of my journey. Not that my journey is about to end…its still a long way. Nowadays knowing how happy she is…takes the stress out of my working day. It what keeps me going everyday…

I love to take walks… especially on the beach back home whenever I
can. It gives me respite from all the humdrum of daily life. Sometimes
my mind would float away and I’ll never realize the distance I’ve
traversed. One thing I have noticed back then… I was alone… I didn’t
know what its like to walk with someone. Have someone to share the
beach, wading to ankle deep surf, making sand castles. I don’t know a
thing about those. But I was curious though, because there were
times you’ll feel all alone, although you’ll pass people by… have a chat
or two and then move on. At one point or another they will be gone.
Some of them are walking the opposite direction, some walking slower
that you’ll pass them by and others are just too fast for you to catch
up. We seldom take the time to slow down or stop at people on our
walks t exchange a few kind words or maybe have coffee or tea, share
a meal perhaps. We are too preoccupied by a lot of things… sadly
most of the time it’s the things that money can buy or source of.
Looking back I have seen that I too have been guilty of such things but
I also see the time I took the time to have a chat with someone. It was
touch and go at first trying to match our pace. Trying to keep
someone… sometimes you have to slow down if it seems you’re too
fast for them or speeding up if you think you’re falling back. It was nice
to have those walks with someone… someone to talk to, laugh at your
jokes, to criticize you if you’re being stubborn or just to be there…
Now I look beside me… I have two people walking with me, the same
one I was trying to keep pace with a long time ago and now she gave
me a beautiful daughter. That someone I’ve met on walks a long time
ago… is you.

Few things in life can be expected. We just have to prepare ourselves. Remember that
for every sorrow… there is joy…for every suffering… there is compassion… for every 
darkness… there is light. It is the circle of life and life must go on… it’s too precious to 
keep on hold. This September, look through the western horizon in the afternoon and 
watch the sunset. For each sunset in your life, for all the darkness it brings, all the 
suffering is a journey that has an end. It comes as the first rays of light break through 
the horizon bathing the clouds…feeling the warmth as the rays touches your face, 
there is a sense of hope and joy… another chance… another sunrise in September.

Wind… take my heart… and take it to my love…. so distant. with your gentle breeze,

let her feel my touch, my embrace. let her know distances are irrelevant…

You might be wondering about  the title "Serendipity" worry not, i’ve provided the definitions. Definitions of  serendipity as follows:
# The art of finding something by looking for something else.
# good luck in making unexpected and fortunate discoveries
# Serendipity is finding something unexpected and useful while searching for something else entirely. For instance, the discovery of the antibacterial properties of penicillin by Alexander Fleming is said to have been serendipitous, because he was merely cleaning up his laboratory when he discovered that the Penicillium mould had contaminated one of his old experiments. First of all i like the word for what it is and secondly the definition isnt bad on the contrary its great. It gives us another glimmer of…. HOPE. Haven’t you stopped to think about the many unexpected discoveries you’ve made in your life, both personal and professional. If you haven’t and try doing so now, you’ll find alot of things. Even in school they teach us to expect the unexpected… how do you just do that. but keeping that aside, those things we unexpectedly find, sometimes are the ones we need but we just didnt realize or too scared to admit we need. These are the spice of life, it makes us wonder what will happen next. it makes the journey worthwhile.